Gus Muldoon's Infamous Seldomly-Updated Blog

Steven Tyler, the frontman of the iconic band Aerosmith, was forced to apologize this week after some garish freak whose only discernible talent is looking like a transgendered hooker took offense to a comment which she deemed as 'racist'.  That talentless transgendered hooker, of course, is Nicki Minaj. The controversy began when Tyler, a former American Idol judge, told an MTV interviewer that the legendary Bob Dylan would probably be voted off this year's show.  Of course, that's pure speculation, since Bob Dylan probably has as much interest in American Idol as Casey Anthony has in motherhood. Tyler's comments did not sit well with Minaj who, along with Mariah Carey and Keith Urban, will have the dubious honor of judging 'talent' on the newest season of the show.  How's that for humor?  Minaj judging talent.  That's kinda like letting the Pope judge a wet t-shirt contest (the Pope, by the way, has a wider vocal range than Minaj and is a much ...

I'll admit it- I hate babies.  But if there's anything I hate more than babies, it's expectant mothers who assume that everyone else on Earth is as enamored with each disgusting pregnancy development as they are themselves.  Thanks to the wonders of technology, a new app called BabyBump allows obnoxious, self-absorbed mommies-to-be an opportunity to annoy the hell out of their Facebook friends with daily posts about the parasitic hellspawns growing inside their tummies.  And let's face it, you have to be pretty darn self-absorbed to think that anyone other than yourself gives a rat's fart in the wind about what's taking place inside your bloated body 173 days into your pregnancy. According to the BabyBump website, the app is a "pregnancy tracker and social health network for expecting families", providing expecting mothers with a "schematic embryo picture of your baby each week" as well as a bunch of useless junk only a woman would care ...

Once again it's the eve of another presidential election, and while millions of Americans will cast their votes for Romney or Obama tomorrow, millions of Americans, unimpressed by either candidate, will remain as unmotivated as a tree sloth on trazodone.  Some folks might even be contemplating throwing their vote away altogether by voting for a third party candidate. Of course, it's beyond me why anyone would vote for a third party candidate in a presidential election.  To me, nothing sounds more pointless than waking up early in the morning and standing in line for hours in order to cast a vote for a person who has about as much of a chance of being elected to the presidency as the mentally-impaired person who wrangles shopping carts in the Walmart parking lot.  However, if you're contemplating exercising your constitutional right to be a moron by voting for a third party candidate, I've made life easier for you (and let's face it, if you're going to suppor...